


untitled (oh my god they were roommates.....)

by homogendered



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Kind of a slow burn, M/M, Roommates, Trans Hinata Shouyou, Trans Male Character, Underage Drinking, adding tags as I go, both of them are dumb as hell, hinata is kind of a bastard, kageyama is very much in denial, kags swears like a sailor, neither of them know how to communicate properly, seriously though they are both really stupid, this is a wip and also my first real fic in years pls b patient
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:47:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22443574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homogendered/pseuds/homogendered
Summary: That’s always how it was with Hinata. Kageyama couldn’t stay mad at him for any one thing longer than ten minutes, because that was apparently the maximum amount of time it took before Hinata’s brain would reset and move on to something else, dragging Kageyama along with him. He felt like he was getting whiplash.((kageyama hates hinata, hinata likes teasing kageyama, they both secretly love fighting each other and they're both idiots. wip, on hiatus sorry :( ))
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 19
Kudos: 130





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> early chapters may be subject to major changes in the future! you've been warned!
> 
> also i write short chapters so that (hopefully) means that updates will be frequent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> grumpy kageyama meets his new roommate

The first time Kageyama Tobio met his college roommate, he wondered if it was too late to apply for a different dorm. Their meeting took place at a coffee shop shortly before the beginning of the semester, at the suggestion of said roommate.

**_Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_Why do we need to meet in person?_

**_Re: Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_so i can make sure ur not just some creep, duh!! :p_

**_Re: Re: Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_I’m not. I’ve already given you my basic personal information, shouldn’t that be enough?_

**_Re: Re: Re: Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_ya but u could just b making that all up!! besides, it’ll b a good chance for us to bond. we should b friends if we’re gonna live together, right?_

**_Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_Whatever, I’ll meet up with you if it’ll make you stop bothering me about it._

**_Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: lets meet up!_ **  
_cool!!! c u then :))_

Thinking back, he should’ve realized what he was getting into after that conversation. But really, nothing could have prepared him for the chaotic ball of energy that was Hinata Shoyou. When Kageyama arrived at their agreed meeting place—some no-name coffee shop relatively near campus—his eyes immediately landed on a young man in baggy clothes with wild ginger hair, fidgeting anxiously in a stool at a high table. He had his phone out in front of him, eyes glued to the screen, and his tongue was poking out of his lips like he’d forgotten to put it back in his mouth. He could practically feel the excited energy radiating off of him from here. Basically the last kind of person Kageyama would ever willingly approach.

He’d just begun to desperately scan the rest of the mostly empty shop, looking for anyone, anyone else at all who could possibly be his soon-to-be roommate, when the ginger glanced up from his phone, brown eyes lighting up when they landed on Kageyama. “Kageyama-san!” he called too loudly, his voice light and cheerful in a way that grated on his ears. He was waving and grinning at him like they were old friends rather than literal strangers. Kageyama clenched his jaw and tried to maintain at the very least a neutral expression as he approached the table Hinata was sitting at. While he didn’t share his apparent sentiment that being roommates meant they had to be best friends, he knew it would be a pretty uncomfortable year if they couldn’t at least be cordial.

“I got you a coffee!” Hinata said excitedly before Kageyama could even think about how to greet him. “I wasn’t sure how you like it, so I just got you the same as mine, I hope that’s okay.”

Kageyama eyed the two coffees sitting on the table, one of them apparently untouched. He hesitated a moment before grumbling out a quiet “thanks” and taking a seat across from the boy. _Maybe he’s not that bad, after all,_ he mused hopefully as he grabbed the cup. It didn’t feel too hot so he brought it to his lips, took a sip and immediately choked, the sickeningly sweet, lukewarm liquid that Hinata had dared to call coffee sputtering from his lips. “What the hell is this?!” he demanded angrily, grabbing a fistful of napkins and wiping the sugary concoction from his lips and then the table.

Hinata was staring at him stupidly, a small hand over his mouth and his eyes wide. “It.... It’s coffee?” he managed to stammer out. Kageyama realized he was holding back laughter, which only made him angrier.

“Like hell it is,” he spit back. “It tastes like pure sugar. Do you actually drink that shit?” He grabbed the cup again, only to move it as far towards Hinata’s side of the table as possible. “It’s not even warm. How long ago did you order that?”

Hinata scratched his head, fluffing up his unruly hair even further as he checked the time on his phone. “Uh, I guess about 20 minutes ago? But it’s not my fault it’s cold! It would’ve still been hot if you’d been here on time!” he pointed out, twisting his lips in a pout that made Kageyama roll his eyes, and then grimace as Hinata picked up the offending drink and sipped at it without batting an eyelash.

To be fair, he _had_ shown up late, mostly because he didn’t really care about this meetup in the first place. And with every moment that passed, the more nervous he felt about the year they were about to spend living together. _What the hell did I sign myself up for?_ he lamented as the ginger across from him took no note of his sour mood, diving into a rapid fire assault of questions that Kageyama only tuned into about halfway through.

“You said you’re gonna be on the volleyball team right? That’s so cool! I used to play when I was younger, but our team wasn’t very good, so we didn’t have that many games. What high school did you play for? What position do you play? Do you have a favorite player? Mine’s this guy they call the Little Giant, see, cause he’s short like me but he can—”

“Do you ever shut the hell up?” Kageyama finally snapped. He knew he should be trying to play nice, and volleyball was actually one of the few things he enjoyed talking about, but this guy was just _too much_.

To his surprise, Hinata just laughed like he’d been told a funny joke, rather than insulted. “Sorry about that,” he giggled, at least having the decency to look a little embarrassed. “I guess I can be a little excitable sometimes. I just really can’t wait to get to know you!”

 _A little?_ Kageyama echoed in his head, frowning at the sincerity in Hinata’s voice. _Why is this guy trying so hard to be friends? Isn't it enough to just politely ignore each other?_

“I’m not looking for friends,” he replied bluntly, figuring he should put his foot down now before this guy got the wrong idea about their relationship.

And that damn orange fuzzball just laughed. Again. “Say, you’re pretty grumpy aren’t you, Kageyama? That’s okay, you’ll warm up to me soon enough!” he said with another wide grin.

He spoke with a confidence that left Kageyama absolutely dumbfounded. He had never had any trouble driving people away before—usually he did it without even trying—so why was this guy he barely knew so insistent they would get along?

 _Whatever,_ he thought to himself with a huff. _He’ll give up in a week or two. Nobody wants to be friends with an asshole._

Confident in that notion, he resigned himself to listening to Hinata’s erratic ramblings for the next half hour, tuning out as much as possible and offering half-hearted replies only when they were absolutely demanded of him. The other didn’t seem to mind—if he even noticed at all—apparently content with this one-sided conversation. Kageyama sighed, feeling a headache coming on.

 _Just give it a week,_ he reminded himself. And oh, how wrong he was.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hinata is a terrible roommate

After the second week of classes, it was becoming apparent that Hinata had absolutely no intention of giving up on the idea of befriending Kageyama. He was insistent, striking up conversation whenever he had a chance—which was far too often, due to their tight quarters. He had somehow remained totally unperturbed by his roommate’s increasingly bad attitude; no matter how much he tried to insult the boy, Hinata would just laugh it off and tease him right back. And when he tried not saying anything at all, he would just have an entire conversation by himself, which was even worse. How the hell did he always have so much to talk about, anyway? It seriously wasn’t normal.

A lot of their conversations were volleyball related—Hinata would always hound him for details after practice, as if he expected to hear about anything other than boring drills and the occasional practice match. But still he acted like it was the most interesting stuff he’d ever heard, hanging onto Kageyama’s every word with rapt attention whenever he gave in. These conversations were the most tolerable, because he got to talk about volleyball and Hinata would actually shut up and listen for once.

Other times, usually when Kageyama was giving him the silent treatment, Hinata would rant about whatever was going on in his life—classes, friends, complaining about homework, what he had for lunch. Random shit that for the most part, was easily ignored.

But the worst was when Hinata would decide that they needed ‘bonding time’ and start dropping personal questions out of the blue.

“Hey Kageyama, do you have a girlfriend?” he asked one day as he was lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling.

Kageyama’s grip tightened on the pencil he was holding. He was sitting at his desk, having politely asked Hinata to keep it down while he tried to work on his homework. A glance at the clock told him he’d been rewarded with almost a full fifteen minutes of silence. Maybe a new record? He sighed and refocused himself, praying to whatever god might be out there that Hinata would take the hint and leave him alone this time.

“Or maybe you have a boyfriend?”

He nearly snapped the pencil in his hand. “No,” he snarled, not looking up from his desk even though he could no longer concentrate on the words in front of him. He heard a giggle from behind that made him clench his teeth.

“No wonder you’re so grumpy, Bakageyama, you must be lonely!”

“How could I possibly be lonely when you’re here talking my ear off every day?” he bit back, swiveling in his chair to glare at his roommate, who was still casually sprawled out on his bed in his pajamas, arms folded behind his head.

“Aw, that’s sweet, Kageyama.”

“It wasn’t a compliment.”

“Yeah, but you meant it.”

“What the hell does that even mean?!”

Hinata just shrugged and gave him a look, like, _How should I know?_ Despite the fact that he was literally the one who just said it. Kageyama groaned, burying his face in his hands. It was going to be a long, long year, wasn’t it?

————

As time passed, Kageyama gradually got used to the unique torture of living with Hinata Shoyou, the most annoying man on the planet. Though his personality never became any less abrasive, he did figure out a few ways to make their time together slightly more tolerable.

First of all, he realized it was possible to use Hinata’s distractibility to his advantage. Like when he started asking uncomfortable questions, Kageyama could just offhandedly mention some topic he knew the boy was interested in, and that was all the prompting he’d need to simply go off on a tangent and forget all about his never-ending quest to invade his roommate's privacy. 

Other things, he’d found, were easier if he just gave into them. Like their conversations after volleyball practice, or when Hinata spent a whole week begging him to play some video game, only to lose interest after an hour or so when he finally agreed. 

But of course, every time Kageyama felt like he’d figured out how to deal with one scenario, his roommate would spring something entirely new on him. Like the touching.

As it turns out, Hinata was _very_ physically affectionate. It started one day when Kageyama came back from volleyball practice and suddenly found two small arms wrapped around his waist in a hug.

“Welcome home!” Hinata shouted.

“What the fuck?!” Kageyama roared, shoving Hinata by the shoulders. “Get off me you idiot!”

But his roommate was persistent, and surprisingly strong for someone so small. He didn’t let go until Kageyama threatened to kick him in the balls, which had him scrambling backwards quickly. He noted that information for future use.

“So mean, Bakageyama!” He had that stupid pouting face on again, the one that never failed to make him want to punch the little brat right in the mouth.

“Whatever, just keep your hands to yourself,” he grumbled as he headed for the shower. 

Apparently this was only a mere suggestion to Hinata, because from that day forward he made it his personal responsibility to invade Kageyama’s personal space at least once per day, whether he was ruffling his hair as he passed behind his desk or grabbing his arm when he got excited telling a story, there was always something. It pissed him off to no end, and no matter how many times Kageyama put him in a headlock, digging his own knuckles into ginger hair, it did nothing to deter him the next time.

All things considered, though, he had to admit he wasn’t _quite_ as miserable as he thought he would be. It was still a living hell, sure, but at the very least he was never bored. And he'd never admit it, but there were even rare times where he found himself stifling a smile or a quiet laugh when Hinata did something utterly ridiculous—like the time Kageyama came home to find him desperately searching through his belongings, clothes strewn all over their tiny dorm room.

“Kageyamaaaa, I can’t find my favorite sweater, have you seen it? You know, the purple one?”

Kageyama eyed said sweater, currently clinging to Hinata’s small torso. “Not a clue,” he said with a shrug.

When Hinata finally realized he’d been wearing it the whole time (a good half hour later) he launched himself at Kageyama, who’d been sitting innocently on his bed, and they began wrestling each other to the ground.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me! That’s so mean Kageyama, you totally knew I was wearing it!” Hinata whined as they scuffled, until eventually the taller boy managed to pin him down, a large hand coming to clamp his stupid whiny mouth shut. 

“Dumbass,” Kageyama huffed with a smug look, panting slightly as he stared down at big brown eyes. For a second neither of them moved, and he thought he saw something change in Hinata’s expression. But then suddenly there was something warm and slimy dragging against his palm and he recoiled in horror, forgetting that he was supposedly the winner here. “ _Hinata!_ Did you seriously just _lick_ me?!”

The smaller man dissolved into a fit of giggles on the floor while Kageyama rushed to the sink to wash his hands. Seriously, living with this guy was the worst.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly these chapters are short enough that I'll probably condense them down the line, but for now enjoy my sporadic bursts of writing

There were a lot of things Kageyama hated about Hinata. Pretty much everything—from his inability to shut up for any significant length of time, to the wild ginger mess of hair that always looked like he’d just rolled out of bed, to the way he would say Kageyama’s name in that teasing voice, drawing it out like it tasted sweet on his tongue (‘ _Kageyamaaaa~’)—_ everything about this man brought an angry heat to his face, made his blood boil and his skin itch.

But there was one (and only one) trait about Hinata that Kageyama truly loved, and it was that he slept like a fucking brick. Once he laid down for the night, Kageyama could rest assured that he wouldn’t be disturbed again at least until morning. There were even some glorious days where his roommate would nap in the middle of the afternoon, and Kageyama would finally have an hour or so of peace to study.

But when he got back from class one day to find Hinata curled up like a baby, snoozing away in _his_ bed, he felt conflicted. His first instinct was to march over and throw the boy onto the floor and remind him for the hundredth time that there are things called boundaries, _dumbass,_ but he paused mid-step as he considered the aftermath. Hinata would surely throw a tantrum and drag him into an argument about how ‘it’s rude to wake someone even if they’re sleeping in your bed uninvited, _Bakageyama,’_ and then the rest of the evening would be lost to their usual antics.

He clenched his jaw and sighed, turning away from the intruder in his bed and begrudgingly taking a seat at his desk. His grades were seriously slipping, and he blamed a lot of it on his inability to study in his own dorm (though to be honest, he hated studying, and he was sometimes secretly grateful for an excuse not to. Not that that made any of this okay in the slightest.) He had to take whatever opportunities he could get to work undisturbed, and he felt satisfied knowing he could still yell at Hinata later when he woke up.

After an hour or so of catching up on assignments and deciphering notes he barely remembered taking, Kageyama’s brain was already fried, and he was almost wishing Hinata would wake up and bother him so he could just give up already. It certainly didn’t help his concentration that he was half expecting to hear that cheerful voice behind him at any moment, asking some random question—or even worse if he decided to sneak up behind him and ruffle his hair again. The thought of it had Kageyama sparing an anxious glance over towards his bed. Hinata was still sleeping peacefully, curled up pretty much exactly as he’d found him, only now his head was turned to the side, mouth hanging open and drooling all over Kageyama’s pillow.

 _Okay. Study time’s over,_ Kageyama decided as he got up from his desk and loomed over the sleeping man in his bed. “Hey, dumbass!” he shouted, giving him a solid _thwack_ on the back of the head. 

Hinata just made a snuffling noise and buried his head further into his roommate’s pillow. Kageyama was beginning to have second thoughts about sleeping being his best quality.

“Hinata! Wake up and get the fuck out of my bed!”

No response, just more drool on his pillow.

Swearing under his breath, Kageyama yanked his blankets away from the sleeping figure, stooping down to curl his arms around Hinata’s small frame and hoist him off the bed. He was even lighter than he’d expected, and astonishingly still seemed to be unconscious. Cursing Hinata under his breath again, he turned and dumped the smaller man unceremoniously on his own bed a few feet away. Still, his roommate showed no signs of waking up.

“Fucking incredible,” he muttered, shaking his head. Kageyama had no idea how a grown human could sleep so heavily, but he decided he didn’t care if it meant he could be free from the assault of Hinata’s overbearing personality for a bit longer. 

He threw his soiled pillowcase in the laundry bin and remade his bed—Hinata had practically made a nest out of his sheets. Why the hell would he want to sleep in Kageyama’s bed anyway? It’s not like his mattress was any better, and his own bed was _right_ there. Was he really just _trying_ to make him mad? Because if so it was definitely working, and he hated it.

When he’d finished remaking his bed he sat down and looked around their small room, suddenly realizing that he didn’t even know what to do with his precious alone time now that he had it. He’d come to think of their dorm as more of a warzone than a place to relax, and he struggled to remember what he used to do in his free time before his life was taken over by a maniac.

Kageyama sighed and glared again at Hinata’s sleeping frame, still spread out on his covers exactly as he’d landed. _What a fucking idiot,_ he thought, approaching the bed and standing over him once more. As he was debating whether to kick him or slap him awake, it crossed his mind that Hinata might actually just be dead, and he pressed two fingers against his neck just to double check before he started beating up a corpse. His skin was soft and warm, and he quickly found the rhythmic pulsing of a heartbeat. And then a second later, he found two brown eyes staring up at him, right above a mouth that looked like it was trying (and failing miserably) not to smile.

“Hiya, Kageyama~”

He withdrew his hand like he’d been burned, glaring down at the smug face below. “Hey yourself, dumbass!” he growled, crossing his arms and trying to look menacing. “What the hell were you doing sleeping in my bed?!”

“Wow Kageyama, your face is like, _super_ scary right now,” Hinata mused as he stretched his tired limbs, looking up at him with a lazy smile. Somehow he didn’t seem very scared at all.

Kageyama was just about to bite back a retort when Hinata suddenly sat up, realizing he’d somehow been moved to his own bed. “Oh my god, Kageyama, what time is it?!” he cried as he scrambled to his feet, looking around for his phone. He made a beeline for Kageyama’s freshly made bed and started pulling at the covers, searching frantically.

“Hey—what—you _dumbass,_ what the hell are you doing?!” Kageyama yelled, lunging after him and grabbing him from behind, wrangling him away from his bed as Hinata tried desperately to squirm free. “Seriously—what—fucking _stop it!_ ”

Despite his efforts, the smaller man managed to slip out of his grasp, scrambling on all fours over to where he spotted his phone lying on the ground near Kageyama’s bed. He anxiously snatched it up, taking one look at the screen before collapsing into a miserable pile on the floor with a groan. “ _Guwaaahhhhh!!_ I can’t believe it, I totally missed it! What the hell, Bakageyama, why didn’t you wake me?!” he whined.

Kageyama stared blankly down at him, knowing in his heart that this was the dumbest person he had ever met in his entire life.

Apparently Hinata mistook the look on his face for confusion. “I was supposed to meet up with some classmates for a group project and now they’re totally gonna think I bailed on them! Seriously, Kageyama, why didn’t you wake me up when you got home?!” he demanded again like that was a totally reasonable expectation to have.

“Is that seriously why you slept in my bed?” he asked, pinching the bridge of his nose and scrunching his eyes like he had a bad headache. “I’m not a fucking alarm clock you know!”

“Yeah I know, but I mean, I pretty much expected you to come in here are all ‘ _Graaaahh_ get out of my bed Hinata!’” He pushed his bangs down to his forehead and scrunched up his face in an imitation of the taller boy. Kageyama tried to kick him but he swiftly rolled away and bounded back over to his own bed, plopping himself down with a shit-eating grin.

“Why the hell would you wanna wake up like that?!”

“’Cause, Bakageyama, you totally make the cutest faces when you’re angry,” Hinata answered with an easy laugh, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Kageyama felt the heat rising to his cheeks—in anger, of course—and he brought both hands up to cover his face as he groaned. _How did this become my fucking life?_

“Hey, now I can’t see, that’s not fair!” Hinata complained. Kageyama didn’t need to open his eyes to see a pair of pink lips drawn in a stupid pout.

“I fucking hate you,” he mumbled through his hands, earning himself another obnoxious giggle as he sighed and let go of his face, turning his back to Hinata and falling defeatedly onto his own bed. He laid on top of the disheveled covers, staring up at the ceiling. It was impossible to believe someone could give him a brand new reason to think ‘ _what the fuck is wrong with this guy?’_ every single day, but here was Hinata Shoyou, doing the impossible.

They both sat quietly for a few minutes as Kageyama questioned all the life choices that brought him here, until eventually Hinata broke the silence. 

“Wanna go get ramen?”

He sighed quietly. That’s always how it was with Hinata. Kageyama couldn’t stay mad at him for any one thing longer than ten minutes, because that was apparently the maximum amount of time it took before Hinata’s brain would reset and move on to something else, dragging Kageyama along with him. He felt like he was getting whiplash.

“Why would I want to go get ramen with you right now?” he snapped, but his voice sounded tired.

“...I’ll pay?”

Kageyama’s stomach growled in the silence that followed and he swore, crawling out of bed and grabbing his jacket. Hinata smiled that too bright smile, and he tried not to stare directly at it.


	4. Chapter 4

Despite how rigorous his schedule was, Kageyama still looked forward to going to practice every day. Volleyball was what he loved, and even if it was hard on his body it was far better than the time he spent sitting through classes or dealing with Hinata back in his dorm. So when he found out practice was cancelled that day due to the gym being closed for cleaning, he was already in a sour mood.

He trudged across campus, staring at his feet as he pondered the fate that awaited him. It wasn’t like he had Hinata’s schedule memorized or anything, but he knew that he never had classes on Fridays, meaning the little demon would definitely be present and full of energy to bother Kageyama all day. He tsked and kicked at the dirt, wishing he had somewhere else to go or something else to do besides returning to his dorm. He didn’t really have any friends, and normally that was fine with him, but now he wished he had someone to hang out with just for the sake of staying away from that orange creep.

 _Maybe I could find Tsukki?_ Immediately he grimaced at the thought, shaking his head. There was no way he was going to ask that jerk to spend time with him, even though he knew he’d be free since he was also on the volleyball team. He’d rather deal with Hinata all day than bear the sight of that smug bastard looking down at him, and there wasn’t really anyone else on campus that he was familiar with.

Kageyama finally brought his eyes up from the ground, realizing with a sigh that he was already back at his dorm building. He stopped and got a carton of milk from the vending machine—he wasn’t really very thirsty, but it was an excuse to delay the inevitable for another minute or two—and slowly he made his way back to his room.

He opened the door, and then immediately slammed it shut as fast as he could, but it was too late. He’d already seen it, the image was undoubtedly burned into his brain, the image of—of—

His heart pounded in his chest and he swallowed dryly, squeezing his eyes shut as he tried to unsee it, but it had the opposite effect.

_Hinata, kneeling on the floor near his bed, shirtless, the pale skin of his back flushed pink over taut muscles, his hands gripping two long legs through jeans as he nuzzled his face into the man’s crotch, a much larger hand threading long fingers through messy orange hair, his face—_

Kageyama opened his eyes and shook his head in an effort to physically dislodge the image from his brain. Instead, he stared at his milk carton on the ground, watching it slowly form a puddle as he vaguely registered that he must have dropped it in shock.

As he stood there dumbly he could hear muffled voices coming from the other side of the door, but didn’t bother trying to make out what they were saying considering he could barely even think over the sound of blood rushing in his ears. He did, however, register the footsteps approaching the door a moment later, and managed to shuffle backwards just in time as the door swung open.

Tsukishima stood in the open doorway, glancing from Kageyama—standing paralyzed in the hallway—to the spilled carton of milk on the floor, back up to Kageyama’s dumbfounded expression.

“Tch.” His face twisted into a sneer as he stepped over the puddle, eyes locked on Kageyama until he pushed past him with a shove of his shoulder, and then he was gone and Kageyama was left standing by himself in the hallway wondering what the fuck just happened.

_Seriously, what the fuck._

He didn’t really know what to do with himself, but eventually he managed to unstick his feet from the floor and enter the room, glancing around cautiously. Hinata was nowhere in sight, but he could faintly hear water running and realized he must have taken off to the shower. Kageyama felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment as his brain helpfully supplied thoughts of what his roommate might be doing in there.

Thoroughly horrified and desperate to distract himself, he tossed his bag on his bed and started digging through dirty laundry until he found a towel he could use to mop up the mess in the hallway. He dried the spill as thoroughly as he could and tossed the nearly empty carton in the trash, wishing he hadn’t bought it in the first place. And then his mind started drifting on its own accord, wondering what would’ve happened if he hadn’t stopped, if he’d been a minute or so faster getting to his room, what would he have seen? An image flashed across his mind of Hinata straddling his teammate’s lap, kissing him and letting him run large hands up his small body, pulling at his shirt and grinding their hips together. In the back of his mind Kageyama was in utter dismay that he would ever— _could_ ever—think about something like this, but his thoughts were spinning entirely out of his control, and then he was picturing what he might have seen had he gotten here a few minutes _later_ and suddenly he felt like he might throw up.

He considered escaping, but he still didn’t have anywhere else to go, and he’d have to come back here eventually anyway. Plus, some weird part of his mind insisted that if he ran away in embarrassment then Hinata would have won somehow. He knew it didn’t really make much sense but he was determined not to let his roommate get the best of him, so he tried to think about what he could do to appear unbothered before Hinata finished his shower and he had to face him.

Feeling like a robot pretending at being a normal human, Kageyama collected his bag and carried it over to his desk, sitting down stiffly. His jaw ached, and he realized he’d been clenching his teeth for some time now. In fact, his whole body was tense, and his skin felt uncomfortably warm and itchy. He got up again and changed out of his sweater into a t-shirt, grabbing a bottle of water from the tiny fridge in the corner before he sat back down at his desk. He pulled his books out of his bag and laid them out even though he was fairly certain he wasn’t going to be able to read anything. As if it wasn’t hard enough for him to concentrate normally, he now had weird images of Hinata and Tsukishima floating around in his head, and it was seriously making his skin crawl. He grabbed the water bottle and chugged, his throat suddenly feeling very dry.

By the time he heard the shower turn off, Kageyama had managed to compose himself at least somewhat, though he was definitely just staring blankly at the book in front of him, not taking in a single word. He was hyper aware of the presence behind him as the bathroom door creaked open and feet padded lightly across the floor, but he kept his eyes determinedly on the jumble of text in front of him, watching the characters dance across the page as he tried to remember how normal people breathe.

He was fully expecting Hinata to break the silence, and he waited for it as he fought the urge to turn around in his seat. After a while, though—he wasn’t sure how long, but it felt like ages when his head was swimming like that—Hinata _still_ hadn’t said a word, and that made him more anxious than anything. He could practically feel those eyes boring holes in the back of his head and he couldn’t take it anymore, so he swiveled around and sure enough, Hinata was sitting on the edge of his bed staring directly at Kageyama, his expression unreadable.

“What are you staring at?” he snapped when still Hinata said nothing. That gaze was making him nervous, like the watchful eyes of a predator, and he wanted to make him react just so he would stop looking at him like that.

It worked, and Hinata’s lips slipped into that easy smile he always wore. “Oh, nothing. I was just admiring your dedication to reading that book upside down. You really are talented, Kageyama!”

Kageyama flushed with embarrassment all over again, hastily closing the book and tossing it back on his desk. “Oh, piss off,” he muttered pathetically, crossing his arms and staring at the wall. Well, there went his hopes of acting normal.

Hinata laughed, and Kageyama hated him for sounding so at ease.

“Aw, it’s okay, Kageyama, you don’t have to be embarrassed,” he cooed.

“I’m not embarrassed.” His face was on fire.

“Jealous?”

“No!”

“Hmmm…” Hinata scratched his chin, seeming to think for a moment. “Turned on?”

“ _No_!!”

Hinata laughed again and Kageyama wanted to strangle him so he couldn’t. “Whatever you say, Bakageyama,” he replied, looking far too smug for Kageyama to let the conversation end there.

“Why the hell were you doing… _that_ , anyway?!” he demanded, since his façade had already been shattered.

Hinata raised an eyebrow at him. “Um, are you asking me why people have sex, Kageyama?”

“No, idiot! I meant—you know—with _him_!”

Hinata’s face fell a bit. “Oh. You mean like, with a guy?”

Kageyama groaned in frustration. He hated everything about this conversation. “ _No,_ I mean with _Tsukishima_!”

Hinata paused for a moment, tilting his head curiously. “Why do you care who I do stuff with?”

“Because—” he started confidently, and then choked on his words as he realized he didn’t have an answer. _Wait, what the hell. Why_ do _I care?_ “Because he’s… on the volleyball team. And he’s an asshole,” he finished lamely.

Hinata beamed like he’d just given him a bouquet of flowers. “Aww, Kageyama, you really do care about me!”

“I _don’t_!” The panic was rising in his chest now that he realized he wasn’t even sure why he was so freaked out in the first place. “I don’t care who you do shit with, just—I don’t wanna have to see it!” He knew he was being too defensive, but he didn’t know why or how to stop. 

“Well it’s not like I was trying to throw it in your face, I thought you had volleyball practice!” Hinata had his arms crossed now, pouting.

“Yeah, well, it was cancelled!”

“And how was I supposed to know that?!”

Kageyama narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “Didn’t Glasses McFuckface mention it?”

Hinata snorted at the insult, and for some reason it made Kageyama’s chest feel a little bit lighter. “He didn't, I swear! I didn't even know he was on the volleyball team," he confessed, looking a little sheepish. "He just said he had some free time and asked me if I wanted to… uh, hang out.” 

Kageyama continued to stare for a moment and then rolled his eyes. He couldn’t tell if Hinata was just playing innocent, or if he was actually that dumb. Knowing him, both were equally possible, and he decided it wasn’t worth wasting his time and energy trying to figure it out. He let out an exasperated sigh, carding his hand through his hair. “Okay, well, whatever, just… Seriously, don’t bring any more guys into our room.”

He expected an argument but was surprised when Hinata simply shrugged and stretched out on his bed, shifting his attention to his phone as it chimed. He hated himself for wondering if it was Tsukishima texting him. “Sure, whatever makes you happy, Kageyama,” he agreed, and Kageyama could hear the little smirk lingering in his voice. It made him want to say something again, but he was really sick of this conversation and still feeling incredibly uncomfortable, so he decided to just let it go and went back to pretending to read for a while.

Most of their evening carried on as normal after that—or at least, whatever was considered normal for them—though Kageyama was definitely still on edge the whole time. If Hinata noticed, he said nothing, and neither of them mentioned the incident again. When nighttime came and he took his shower before bed, he let the hot water pour over him, trying to wash away the weird energy he’d been carrying since he got home. He ran his hands down his chest and abdomen, hesitating as they traveled lower towards his groin. He usually jacked off in the shower before bed, and his dick twitched expectantly. Sighing, he let one hand wrap firmly around the base of his shaft and gave a few slow tugs. It felt good, and he let his eyes flutter closed, leaning into the sensation—

_Hinata, on his knees, one hand between his own legs and the other wrapped around Kageyama’s dick, stroking him encouragingly as he parted his lips, leaning forward—_

His eyes snapped open and he immediately let go of himself, feeling horrified and guilty and panicked and way, _way_ too hot. He fumbled with the temperature valve, turning it all the way down and letting the icy water cool his skin for a few minutes before he got out, feeling even more frustrated than before.

It was late, so Hinata was already curled up in his bed asleep by the time Kageyama stepped back into their dark room. He crawled into bed and buried himself in the covers, wishing he could just close his eyes and forget this whole day ever even happened, but he knew it was impossible. He knew as soon as he let his eyelids fall shut he would see those wide, brown eyes looking back at him, so he stared at the ceiling and waited for exhaustion to take over, numbing his mind and body until finally he fell into a restless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well uh, this chapter definitely ended up being very different from what I'd planned, but I had fun writing it so I hope you're all enjoying the ride and let me know what you think so far! thanks to everyone who's commented and left kudos already, it means a lot!


	5. Chapter 5

Whenever Kageyama stepped onto the court, he was in total control of his body. His mind was sharp—he felt focused, confident, in tune.

Or at least, he usually did. But ever since the ‘incident’ last Friday, Kageyama’s brain could no longer function like it used to, too busy being haunted by… unspeakable thoughts. He’d never even considered the possibility of Hinata (or Tsukishima, for that matter) as a sexual person before, but it was like that one brief moment had shattered some unknown barrier in his mind. It definitely didn’t help that he spent the vast majority of his time at volleyball practice with Tsukki or in his dorm with Hinata, meaning he really had no escape from either of them. Fucking figures that those two would be joining forces to ruin his life. Not that he’d seen or heard of any interaction between them since Friday, but he didn’t have to. Kageyama’s traitorous brain was perfectly willing to fill in the blanks. 

There were a lot of questions Kageyama still had about what he’d seen—How do you even know each other? Was it a one-time thing? Did you really not know he was on the volleyball team? Are you _dating_?—but he’d already suffered enough embarrassment for a lifetime, and there was no way in hell he was going to give either one of them a reason to think he was interested in hearing about their sex lives. Because he really, _really_ , wasn’t. He didn’t _want_ to be thinking about any of this stuff, but it was like a bad headache that just wouldn’t go away.

Seriously, out of all the people his teammate could have chosen to do that with, why the _hell_ did it have to be _Hinata_? Was it really just a coincidence? Or did Tsukishima do it on purpose just to mess with him? He wouldn’t put it past the guy, but for some reason that didn’t feel like the right answer.

Hinata, for his part, was literally the same as ever. Neither of them mentioned what happened, and if he noticed a change in Kageyama’s demeanor he didn’t say anything, and for that he was grateful.

But of course, if Hinata was the most oblivious person Kageyama knew, then Tsukishima was the most observant. 

Fuckin’ Tsukishima… If Kageyama thought he was a bastard before, well… he didn’t know what he was now, but he was worse. _So_ much worse. He could clearly tell that Kageyama had been affected in some way by the whole ordeal, and he was apparently determined to make the most of it—probably in revenge for Kageyama ruining his stupid hook-up.

Though neither of them said anything about the incident itself, the tension between them at practice was palpable. The playful jabs they normally exchanged had escalated to straight up taunting, bordering on full-blown fights. Like today, as they were taking a water break, when he felt that looming presence behind him and glanced back to see Tsukishima only a few feet away, smirking as he whispered something into Yamaguchi’s ear. The smaller boy snickered and glanced in Kageyama’s direction, but at least he had the decency to look embarrassed when he saw that Kageyama was watching. Tsukki, however, looked as smarmy as ever, giving him a side-eye that Kageyama decided he hated even more than Hinata’s stupid pouting face. 

He jumped slightly as the whistle blew, bringing him back to reality. Oh yeah, right. Volleyball. That’s what he was here for.

They were running a scrimmage match between the upper and lower classmen, and Kageyama was up first to serve. He bounced the ball a few times, adjusting to its weight as he tried to center his frazzled mind. 

“Hey, nice serve, Kageyama!”

Kageyama’s grip tightened on the ball at the sound of Tsukishima’s jeering voice, but he refused to look over, taking a deep breath as the whistle sounded again. He tossed the ball high into the air and took a few running steps before launching himself, his body coiled for a powerful swing.

Somewhere in the back of his mind he saw orange hair, long pale fingers twisting and pulling.

_SMACK!_

The gym was eerily quiet as everyone stared at Tsukishima, doubled over from the force of the impact, one hand cradling the back of his head. Kageyama felt equal parts satisfaction and apprehension.

He cleared his throat awkwardly. “Uh. My bad.” He really honestly hadn’t been aiming for Tsukishima. At least, not consciously anyway.

Tsukishima hissed and turned to face him, looking understandably pissed, but there was a glint of mirth in his eyes as well. “What’s the matter, Kageyama? Got something on your mind?” he taunted. “You shouldn’t be playing if your head isn’t in the game, you know.”

Kageyama clenched his fists and looked away, really not wanting to cause a scene in front of all his teammates. “I’m fine,” he grumbled. “I just messed up a serve, it happens.”

Tsukki was standing in front of him now, arms crossed as he glared down. “Tch, what a lame excuse. Your tosses have been off all week.”

Kageyama knew he was right, but he bristled in anger anyway. “Yeah, well, your blocks haven’t been much better. What gives you the right to critique my performance, anyway?” He could hear his voice rising in volume despite his efforts to stay calm.

“Oh, I don’t know, maybe the ball you just sent flying at my skull?” 

“It’s not like I did it on purpose!” Kageyama wasn’t even sure if that was true or not.

“Oh yeah? That’s a pretty convenient accident, I'd say.”

They were now inches away from each other, Tsukishima eyeing him down knowingly. Just as he was certain that things were about to get physical, there was a strong arm around each of their shoulders.

“Looks like you’re both pretty worked up again today!” came Daichi’s pleasant voice between them. Their captain’s calm tone and smiling face were sharply contrasted by the strength with which he was squeezing their shoulders. “We certainly can’t have teammates fighting on the court, so why don’t the two of you run laps for the rest of the hour? You can come back and do your serve drills when practice is over.” He ushered the two of them towards the door as he spoke. “And don’t forget to clean up when you’re done!”

With a final shove from Daichi, the two of them were suddenly left standing outside the gym as the door slammed in their faces.

“Tch. Nice going,” Tsukishima muttered, not waiting for Kageyama as he turned his back and took off in a light jog.

Kageyama sprinted a bit to catch up with him. “ _Me_? You’re the one who wanted to start a fight!”

Tsukishima ignored him, moving a little faster as he turned the corner around the building.

Kageyama matched his pace. “Seriously, what’s your fucking problem?” he pressed.

That got him a wry chuckle. “I’m not the one with the problem.”

“And what the hell does that mean?!” Kageyama demanded.

“You’re the one with the jealousy issue, aren’t you?”

Kageyama halted in his tracks, and Tsukishima stopped to face him, his hands on his hips as he stared down at Kageyama expectantly.

" _Jealous_?" he echoed. "Why the hell would I be jealous?!"

Tsukishima raised his eyebrows and laughed. “Seriously? You’re gonna play dumb about it?”

Kageyama fought the urge to start pulling his own hair out. “I’m not playing, I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about!”

Tsukishima chuckled again, bringing a hand to his face as he shook his head. “Man, you really are hopeless, huh? Don’t worry about it, Kageyama," he assured. "I’m not gonna touch your little boytoy again.”

“My _what_?!”

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” he snickered.

“ _What’s_ obvious?!”

Tsukishima rolled his eyes and laughed again, like this was the most amusing thing in the world to him. “That you like Hinata, stupid. Why else would you be so upset he tried to suck my dick?”

That had Kageyama flustered, choking on his own saliva as he tried to form a response. “What—you— _what_?! You’re fucking kidding me, right?! Hinata’s the biggest moron I’ve ever met in my life, why the hell would I care that he—” Kageyama paused, narrowing his eyes a fraction. “Wait, are you saying… You mean, _he_ asked _you_?”

Tsukishima looked utterly delighted. “Yeah, he did. Why, does that make you _mad_ , Kageyama?” he goaded, leaning in.

Kageyama rolled his eyes in frustration. “No, it doesn’t! I told you I don’t fucking care, he just—the way he said it made it seem like you were the one who…” Kageyama trailed off; Tsukishima’s expression was only growing more triumphant the longer he spoke, and he couldn’t stand it anymore. “Fuck, whatever, just forget about it, asshole.” He turned away and continued jogging. They hadn’t even done a full lap yet, and he didn’t want to risk the chance of Daichi coming to scold them again. 

They ran in silence for the rest of the hour, but Kageyama could feel the obnoxious look on Tsukishima’s face behind him the whole time.

_Whatever. Let him feel smug all he wants. He’s an idiot if he actually thinks I’d be jealous of him and Hinata._

Eventually their teammates came filing out of the gym, and the two of them moved on to the rest of their punishment wordlessly. _At least Tsukki knows how to shut the hell up_ , he mused as he tossed serve after serve, dreading the conversation he knew was waiting for him when he returned to his dorm. Giving Hinata the rundown after practice was so routine for them at this point that it would be weird if he refused, but he definitely didn’t want to talk about today. Of course he could just make something up, but he was pretty shit at lying, and even oblivious Hinata always seemed to be able to tell when he was fudging the truth. _So annoying_.

He and Tsukishima quietly finished their drills and made quick work of cleaning the gym, parting ways without a word. Kageyama didn’t even bother changing out of his practice clothes, he just wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible.

As expected, Hinata was on him the moment he came through the door.

“Hey Kageyama~! How was practice?”

His roommate was sitting on the floor between their beds, crouched in front of their tiny TV, a game controller in his hands. He looked engrossed in whatever he was playing—maybe he was distracted enough that Kageyama could just ignore him? A few moments passed, making him hopeful, but his dreams were shattered as Hinata paused the game, turning to look up at him expectantly.

Kageyama just stared back blankly, feeling something terrible stirring in the pit of his stomach.

Hinata got to his feet, reaching up to wave a hand in front of his face. “Hellooo? Earth to Kageyamaaa!” he teased. “Anybody in the—?”

Kageyama snatched his wrist out of the air and glared down at him. “Knock it off,” he growled harshly. “I’m not in the mood today.”

Hinata blinked a few times, staring back at him with an expression that Kageyama couldn’t read. “Um, did you have a bad practice?” Hinata asked after a moment's hesitation. There was something slightly off about his voice, too.

“Practice was fine. I’m just not in the mood to talk to you,” he sniped.

“Oh,” was all Hinata responded with, still staring at him with that weird look in his eyes. Kageyama waited for him to press again, but they just kept gazing at each other in silence.

 _What the hell? Is that really all he has to say? Since when does Hinata let something go so easily?_ For some reason Hinata’s silence was pissing him off, despite the fact that it was literally all he’d ever wanted from him.

“Um, Kageyama?” Hinata’s unusually soft voice finally interrupted his thoughts. “You’re, um, you’re kind of hurting me.” 

He glanced pointedly at their hands, and Kageyama realized he still had an iron grip on Hinata’s small wrist. Oddly, he wasn’t struggling to break free, just letting his arm hang limply in the air while Kageyama pressed bruises into his skin with his fingers.

He hurriedly let go, huffing as he pushed past Hinata and escaped to the bathroom. Half expecting the smaller man to give chase, he locked the door behind him and then leaned back against it, letting his head hit the wood with a soft thump. He stared at his own hand, thinking about Hinata’s soft skin beneath his fingers and that strange expression on his face.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Tsukki’s smug voice rang out; _'It's obvious, isn't it?'_

Kageyama buried his face in his hands and groaned. _There has got to be something seriously fucking wrong with me._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if any of the minor characters in this story are a little ooc, I didn't expect to be writing Tsukki but here we are lmao. I'm trying my best to do him and all the others justice, so thanks for being patient with me!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that this update took me so long ;_; This chapter is a bit longer than the others and I'm also busy at college, but I really wanted to make this a good one! 
> 
> Thank you all for being patient with me and I hope you enjoy reading~!

The days following his conversation with Tsukishima were challenging, to say the least. Kageyama knew logically that everything that guy said was just bullshit meant to get under his skin, but well… it had gotten under his skin alright.

For starters, being around Hinata was more stressful than ever thanks to the very much unwanted yet inexplicably pervasive sexual thoughts he was being bombarded with on a daily basis. It was like the more he tried to fight them the worse they became, and by god he was fighting them with everything he had. It definitely wasn’t helping that he hadn’t been able to jerk off since the incident—there was just no way he could do it while he was still unable to control his own fantasies. It was a vicious cycle, and it was eating away at him from the inside.

In turn, it was also getting more and more difficult to keep his composure around Hinata. The guy was oblivious, sure, but he wasn’t blind, and it was only a matter of time before he noticed something. Multiple times over the past few days, Kageyama’s mind had slipped off to that terrible place while in his roommate’s presence. He was an unwilling passenger to his own train of thoughts, watching on in horror as his traitorous eyes dragged themselves up Hinata’s casually resting form, watched him lick his lips, wondered what they would taste like, how they would feel against his own, or on his neck, or dragging over his—

“What’s with the creepy look, Bakageyama?”

Kageyama visibly jolted, his chest flaring with anxiety as he realized Hinata was staring right back at him. He had no idea what kind of expression he’d been wearing but he quickly twisted it into a glare.

“Seriously, you look like you’re about to jump me or something!” Hinata joked, unaware how close he was to the truth. “You’re not planning to kill me, are you?”

Now that he mentioned it, it didn’t seem like a half-bad option. “I might be,” Kageyama grumbled, tearing his eyes away from Hinata’s stupid face and fumbling for his phone. 

Of course, Hinata just laughed him off like always. “So mean, Kageyama. I swear you’re even grumpier than normal lately!” he whined.

Kageyama ground his teeth together as he stared at his phone screen, mindlessly opening and closing random apps. This was bad; if even Hinata could tell that something was amiss, then he must have been acting even weirder than he’d thought.

“Maybe I’m just getting sick of your shit,” he snapped back, praying he didn’t sound too defensive.

“Hey!” came Hinata’s indignant response, but he didn’t push the matter any further, making Kageyama breathe a quiet sigh of relief.

 _Just keep it together for a little longer,_ he told himself. _In a few days I’ll forget all about this mess and everything will go back to normal_.

——

Barely a full two weeks later, Kageyama knew he was nearing his breaking point. He couldn’t focus on _anything_ —his grades were in the toilet, Daichi had pulled him aside after practice more than once to ask if he was feeling alright, Tsukki was more smug than ever, and Hinata was personally convinced that Kageyama was planning to cook him up and eat him with the amount of times he’d caught him staring hungrily in his direction (‘Kageyama! You’re making that scary face again!’). Thank god Hinata was too dumb to realize what was actually going on in Kageyama’s brain.

Oh, yeah. And he was also so, so, _ungodly_ horny he thought he might explode any day now.

All of this was terrible, but the final straw was on Saturday, the day of their first official tournament of the season. Kageyama had spent the day calming himself down, trying to get into the proper headspace so he could play without disappointing himself and his teammates. And it had worked, at least for a while. Something about the atmosphere of being away at a tournament always put him in the groove—he’d managed to stuff all his wandering thoughts into the back of his mind and played exceptionally well through their first two sets. He was totally in focus. That is, until Tsukishima stopped to ask him if his ‘boyfriend’ had come to watch him play. After that, the dam came bursting wide open, and Kageyama had fumbled so bad in the next set that he’d been benched for the rest of the game. He, one of the top setters _in the nation,_ had been benched because of stupid fucking Hinata Shoyou. He didn’t know how he was going to stop himself from attacking the boy on sight when he got back to his dorm.

So maybe, he thought, it was a true case of divine intervention when he arrived to find that Hinata was nowhere in sight. At first he thought the boy was sleeping, but once his eyes adjusted to the darkness he realized his roommate’s bed was completely empty. A brief check of the bathroom confirmed it; Hinata was simply gone.

Despite the fact that he’d been dreading seeing him all day, something odd twisted in the pit of his stomach. Hinata waited up for him after every single practice without fail, and he’d _begged_ Kageyama to let him come see the match today (‘no _fucking_ way,’ he’d snarled), so why the hell wouldn’t he be here now to pester him about it?

Kageyama checked the time on his phone. It was nearly 1 in the morning already; their games had run late, and then they’d had to travel 2 hours by bus just to get home. Considering he’d never seen Hinata stay up past midnight, he could only assume his roommate had decided to spend the night elsewhere. 

He tried not to think too hard about with whom or why. He knew Hinata had friends on campus—though he only ever seemed to hang out with them when Kageyama was busy elsewhere—so it seemed plausible enough that he’d gone to a friend’s place and passed out. There was no reason to analyze beyond that, nor was there any reason to analyze the pang in his chest at the idea of Hinata sleeping in someone else’s bed.

Anyway, as perplexing as all this was, Kageyama knew better than to question a blessing delivered to him in his hour of greatest need. Awash with relief that today was going to end as the first completely Hinata-free day he’d had in weeks, he stripped his clothes and made his way to the shower, eager to wash off and get to bed. Even sleeping had become difficult lately, what with the knowledge that the object of his uninvited fantasies was resting only a few feet away. But tonight, he would finally be able to relax and get a peaceful night’s sleep instead of tossing and turning for hours on end.

….Except things could never be so simple, right?

Kageyama realized his naivety when he crawled under his covers, stretched out his exhausted body and let his eyes fall shut—only for his mind to immediately be overcome by the same thoughts that had ruined his performance on the court today.

Right, of course. Just because Hinata wasn’t here didn’t mean it was any easier not to think about him. In fact, it was somehow even more difficult than usual to keep it at bay. In this rare moment of privacy, the walls he’d been working so hard to build were crumbling around him now that there was no one around to notice. Normally this would send him spiraling into a panic, but he was just too tired to care tonight. Besides, after today, it’s not like there was much point in lying to himself anymore. It was pretty clear by now that these thoughts weren’t just a weird reaction to what he’d seen, something that would blow over in time. No, they were too pervasive, too vivid, too specific to be anything but his own sick fantasies. Fighting them had only made matters worse, so what was there left to do but give in? He resigned himself to his fate with a tired sigh, closing his eyes and letting his exhausted mind take over, one hand sliding hesitantly under the waistband of his pajamas. He stroked himself slowly as he let his mind wander, realizing with a flush of embarrassment that he was half-hard before he’d even started.

In his mind he saw himself coming home that evening, only Hinata was there this time, crouched on the floor, illuminated by the glow of their TV. He would greet Kageyama and start chatting away like usual, but freeze when he marched forward and leaned down, grabbing a fistful of ginger hair and tilting his head back. He pictured wide brown eyes staring up at him in awe as he told Hinata what had happened on the court today. How he’d been fucking _benched_ because he couldn’t stop thinking about Hinata’s stupid mouth long enough to focus, not even on the one thing he really cared about in life. He’d tell the little bastard exactly how much he hated him for it, for getting him so worked up, how he owed it to him to make up for all the trouble he’d caused.

And then there would be hands on his waist, tugging him free of his clothes, a pink tongue darting out to lick at his lips. Hinata would move too quickly, full of that same excited energy he had in all situations, so Kageyama would tug on his hair again and order him to go slow. Hinata would try, eager as he was to please. He’d lick and kiss sweetly at the head of his cock, but soon forget about Kageyama’s command and start taking in as much of his length as he could, choking on it as he tried to push past his limit. He’d swallow him up greedily, and Kageyama would let him, relishing in the satisfaction of finally putting that stupid mouth to good use. He was losing himself to his fantasy, imagining himself rocking forward into wet heat while he squirmed in his bed, rocking into his hand, too gone to give a shit about the breathy moans escaping his lips. It felt good, oh _god_ it felt so good. He could feel himself nearing the edge, getting ready to spill over and let out all the pent up sexual frustration he’d been carrying for so long. He rubbed at his slit and whimpered, imagining it was Hinata’s tongue flicking against him and god he was _so_ close—

Suddenly there was a rattling of keys at the door, and Kageyama had the realization that his alone time tonight was not in fact the work of some benevolent god, but that of the devil himself.

Hinata spent just enough time fumbling around with the lock for Kageyama to pull his hand out of his pants and roll onto his side, squeezing his eyes shut tight and trying to steady his breathing while panic bubbled up inside him. He couldn’t imagine a worse possible scenario to be walked in on, but at the very least it was dark and he could easily pretend to be asleep.

Apparently his roommate managed to remember how keys work, because he heard the door swing open and slam shut. There was a sudden brightness against his eyelids, causing them to snap open reflexively. For a second he was worried he’d be caught without the shield of darkness, but Hinata seemed… preoccupied. He was moving strangely, mumbling unintelligibly to himself as he stumbled a few feet towards his bed, not quite making it there before giving up and lowering himself not-so-gracefully to sit on the floor. He began wrestling with his boots—the laces were apparently giving him some trouble, so he started trying to just pull them off by force, which also didn’t seem to be working. He groaned in frustration, flailing his feet around like a little kid. Kageyama watched out of morbid curiosity, and after a minute or so Hinata finally managed to figure it out, proceeding to chuck the boots over his shoulder in the general direction of the shoes basket near the entryway. One of them hit the door with a loud thud, while the other went sailing into the stack of video games next to their TV, toppling them over with a loud crash.

“Hey, what the _hell_ are you doing, dumbass?!” Kageyama hissed before he could remember he was supposed to be pretending to sleep. “It’s nearly 2 in the fucking morning you know!” 

“ _Uwahhh_!” Hinata screamed as he scrambled around on the floor, spinning to face Kageyama with a look of surprise, his cheeks flushed light pink and his eyes wide. “When did you get here, Kageyama?!”

Kageyama glared as darkly as he could while still curled up under his covers hiding a semi. “I’ve been here for a while,” he grumbled, eyeing his roommate suspiciously. Even Hinata wasn’t usually _this_ dumb, something was definitely up with him.

“Aww, sorry ‘Yama, I didn’t mean to wake you up!” Hinata apologized loudly, scratching the back of his head. “I guess I forgot what time it was…” he trailed off as if distracted by a different thought, head lolling a bit as he gazed at Kageyama, his eyes warm and slightly out of focus.

Kageyama squinted at him, sitting up slightly to rest on his elbow so he could get a better look at the boy. “Hinata, are you… _drunk_?” he asked in disbelief.

Hinata scrunched up his face, squinting back at him. “Kageyama, are you… _my mom_?” he imitated, and then dissolved into a fit of laughter at his own joke. Kageyama didn’t find it quite so funny.

“What the _hell_ are you _thinking_?!” he hissed, trying to keep his voice down despite the fact that Hinata was already making enough noise for the two of them. 

“Uhh, I’m _thinking_ that you’re kind of being a total party pooper, _Bakageyama_ ,” Hinata accused once he’d recovered from his laughing fit, though he still couldn’t stifle a giggle as he continued to mock his roommate. “Don’t tell me you’ve never been drunk before!” 

“Of course not! We’re underage, it’s _illegal_!” Hinata blinked, staring at Kageyama like the thought had never even occurred to him before. “Seriously, where’d you even get alcohol anyway?!” he demanded.

Hinata rolled his eyes dramatically. “I went to a party, _duh_. Sheesh, don’t you know _anything_ about having fun, Kageyama?” he teased, scooting gradually closer to Kageyama’s bed, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

Kageyama instinctively shuffled backwards, painfully reminded of his predicament when his half-hard length rubbed against the sheets. “No, apparently I don’t. Now get the hell away from me and turn the lights off so I can go back to sleep!” he snapped, wanting this conversation to end as quickly as possible, _please_ for the love of god.

But Hinata just kept getting closer, staring at him with that look that was frying his brain cells and making his dick twitch with interest. His roommate looked like he wasn’t listening to a word Kageyama was saying, too busy examining his face with hooded eyes.

“...Hey Kageyama, have I ever told you how cute you are when you’re mad?” he asked after an extended pause, during which Kageyama’s heart rate had skyrocketed. Hinata had come all the way over to place his elbows on the edge of the mattress, head resting crookedly in one hand.

If Kageyama’s face hadn’t already been red from his earlier excitement, it certainly was now.

“...You’ve mentioned it before,” he managed to croak out, feeling lightheaded—his throat was so tight he was struggling to breathe. Maybe if he was lucky, he would pass out and not have to deal with this situation anymore.

Hinata giggled and leaned in closer, like he was about to impart a dirty secret. “It’s kinda my favorite thing about you,” he whispered, eyes gleaming, and then he was practically leaping onto Kageyama like a jungle cat.

“Get off of me!” he shouted, immediately trying to shift his hips as far away as possible while pale limbs and orange hair flailed around above him. He’d meant his words to be a command, but he was worried it came out sounding more like a desperate plea.

Hinata didn’t seem to notice the weird tone in his voice, because he kept wrestling with Kageyama, grabbing at his arms and trying to pin him down. Even with his small hands he managed to get a firm grip, but he still wasn’t strong enough to force the taller boy down onto the bed. In absolute panic mode, Kageyama pushed against Hinata with all his might, trying to eject him to the floor. It worked, but with an unfortunate side effect; Hinata’s grip on his forearms was tighter than he’d thought, and he brought Kageyama down with him, sending them both crashing to the floor in a heap.

Kageyama took one look at the panting boy beneath him and immediately scrambled backwards on his hands and feet, but Hinata was fast to follow him. The smaller man picked himself up from the ground and sprung forward, barrelling full-force into Kageyama’s chest. He felt the wind knocked out of him as his back hit the floor, two small hands pinning him down by the shoulders and a warm weight planting itself firmly on his lap.

He sucked in a harsh breath, his hips twitching upwards of their own accord. He still wasn’t fully hard, but he had a sinking feeling that he was about to be in a matter of seconds. Burning with shame, he slammed his eyes shut, turning his cheek into the carpet to avoid the piercing eyes above him. He took a shaky breath in through his nose, nearly choking on it as he spoke.

“Hinata… I need you to get off of me… _please_ ,” he managed to get out, only feeling more embarrassed at the strained sound of his own voice. He heard a tiny gasp above him, but kept his eyes closed tight, waiting for Hinata to scramble backwards in disgust.

For a moment nothing happened, and Kageyama wished he could melt away into the carpet. Seconds felt like hours with Hinata perched on top of his aching erection, both of them silent except for their heavy breathing. 

Finally, Hinata shifted back to sit on Kageyama’s thighs, but the weight of his ass was quickly replaced by a different pressure, firm and deliberate.

His eyes snapped open and nearly rolled into the back of his head as he took in the sight of Hinata staring curiously down at him, one hand pressed flat against Kageyama’s chest and the other palming his dick through flimsy pajamas. He was absolutely speechless, beginning to wonder if maybe he’d fallen asleep earlier and his real body was still lying in bed, humping the mattress. That had to be it, right? There’s no way that something like this could _actually_ be happening, this was just another vivid manifestation of his fucked up desires.

The idea flew from his mind when Hinata squeezed, and Kageyama fucking _whimpered_ , unable to control the way his hips stuttered, held down only by the weight of the boy on top of him. Now that his eyes were open, he was trapped under Hinata’s gaze—bright despite the fog of alcohol and brimming with a fascination that Kageyama couldn’t understand. He didn’t know what his own face looked like, but he was sure it was something akin to pure terror, his whole body stiff as a board as he tried not to rock into Hinata’s touch.

“I wanna see it. Is it okay if I see it?” came Hinata’s breathy voice above him, his eyes flicking briefly down to his crotch, then back up to his face like he was waiting for a response. Didn’t he know Kageyama’s voice had already died and gone to hell by now?

Hinata continued rubbing him through the fabric, then hesitated just a split second before diving his hand under the waistband, fingers just barely brushing against his twitching member. “Please?” he whispered, and this time Kageyama really and truly moaned, nodding his head without consciously deciding to do so.

That was all the agreement Hinata needed, who was suddenly sitting up just enough to yank his pajamas down to his thighs, letting his flushed cock spring free. There was a strange pause where Hinata simply stared down at him bug-eyed, as if he’d never seen anything like it before. Kageyama was only barely above-average in size, so it’s not like there was that much to gawk at, but Hinata seemed transfixed. It went on just long enough to make him consider scrambling away again, but then a small hand reached out to run fingers lightly up his length and he choked on another moan, one hand coming to clamp over his mouth while the other scratched at the carpet.

Hinata’s eyes remained focused on his groin, watching intently as he continued for a moment with the feather-light touches before he finally gripped Kageyama properly, swiping a gentle thumb through the bead of precum that had gathered at the slit and spreading it around the head.

“It’s really... soft,” he murmured in apparent wonder, pressing his thumb into the delicate skin, slowly tracing the ridge where the head met the rest of his length. Kageyama bit down on his tongue hard, his eyes watering slightly as he tried not to go into cardiac arrest.

Ever so slowly, the teasing hand on his dick began to slide up and down, pumping him at an agonizing pace while Hinata continued to watch, totally enraptured, his cheeks flushed and lips slightly parted. Kageyama had no idea why he was moving so slowly, absorbing every little detail like this was the first time he’d seen a dick in his entire life. Whatever the reason, it was driving him _insane_ , and he couldn’t help the low whine that passed through his fingers as Hinata paused in his strokes to play with the head again.

At that point he finally glanced back up to Kageyama’s face, and something in his eyes must have betrayed how desperate he was, because Hinata suddenly began to stroke him in earnest. It was… kind of sloppy, to be honest, but Kageyama supposed that was to be expected from the man who’d been struggling to take off his own shoes just moments ago. Besides, he was so on edge at this point that he could probably come from just about anything.

Hinata didn’t let up the pace, and he could feel his orgasm rapidly approaching for the second time that night. “ _Hinata_ —” he tried to choke out a warning, but a firm squeeze near the head of his cock sent him flying over the edge before he could finish.

He barely heard Hinata breathe out a soft, “Oh,” as he clenched his eyes shut, his back arching up off the floor. It tore through him in waves, his dick pulsing again and again as he covered himself in come. The weeks of denying his release combined with the unintentional edging earlier on had made for possibly the longest orgasm of his life, and he was helpless to do anything but lie there and squirm as Hinata stroked him through it. 

Eventually the touches became too much for his sensitive cock and he hissed, reaching down blindly to pull Hinata’s hand away. He found it, and wrenched his eyes back open to see Hinata’s flushed face, staring down in awe at the mess all over Kageyama’s t-shirt. The hand Kageyama now held in his own was equally sticky, and for some reason the sight of their joined hands covered in his come made him jolt, quickly coming back down from the high of his orgasm.

Driven by the panic in his chest, Kageyama squirmed violently under Hinata, who wasn’t expecting the sudden movement and fell backwards onto the floor with a yelp. That was all the chance Kageyama needed to scramble to his feet, pulling his pajama pants back up with him. Not sparing a second glance down at Hinata for fear he’d be trapped by that gaze again, he ran to the bathroom like a frightened animal, slamming the door behind him and pressing his back against it.

Slowly, he slid to the floor, hiding his burning face in his knees as his eyes began to sting. _Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit shit shit shit shitshitshitshitshit—_

A gentle knock at the door behind him made his chest seize up. “Kageyama…?” he heard Hinata’s muffled voice call hesitantly.

“Go away!” he shouted, his mouth reacting for him since his brain was currently out of commission. He waited for Hinata to say something stupid back, like whining about being rude, but nothing came. Instead, he heard the quiet sound of footsteps, followed by the light under the crack in the door flicking out and the soft shuffling of Hinata climbing into bed. He felt another lurch of anxiety in his chest, this one accompanied by a flash of guilt that he tried not to examine too much. 

All of this had been Hinata’s doing, he had no reason to feel guilty. It wasn’t his fault that his roommate didn’t know how to respect boundaries—if he did, they never would’ve gotten into this mess in the first place!

That’s what he told himself, anyway, as he sat on the hard tile, watching a spider slowly crawl across the floor near his feet. He didn’t know how long he sat there, his mind and body both lost to numbness, but when he finally convinced himself to stand up his legs had fallen asleep. He stared at himself in the mirror, hastily tearing the soiled shirt over his head and washing his hands in the sink. Once he was clean he flicked the light off, cautiously opening the door to peer out into their dark room.

He’d half expected Hinata to be awake still, or to have done something annoying like pass out in Kageyama’s bed, but he was curled up on his own mattress, facing towards the wall as he breathed deep, even breaths. Ignoring the way his stomach sank, Kageyama quietly crawled back into his own bed, knowing he had another long, restless night ahead of him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we finally earned that explicit rating!!
> 
> thanks again to everyone for being patient with me and sticking with the fic this long, as always feel free to let me know what you thought in the comments! hearing from you guys always makes me motivated to keep writing ♡✧( ु•⌄• )


	7. Chapter 7

Kageyama spent the night drifting in and out of a fitful sleep. Every time he got close to unconsciousness, the memory of what had just happened would float back to the surface and cause him to jolt awake, his body rolling with nerves. He spent most of the night like this, slipping in and out of consciousness and plagued with anxieties about the morning to come. 

_What the hell am I going to say to him when he wakes up? What the hell is_ he _going to say to_ me _? Why would he ever do something like that? Was it supposed to be a joke? Was he making fun of me? Is he grossed out because he can tell I liked it? Fuck, is it too late to move out? Maybe it’ll be okay if we just don’t talk about it…_

The light had just barely started to filter in through the window when Kageyama came to once again, only this time he was awoken by a door slamming. It took his foggy brain a moment to process the sound, but once he had he bolted upright, glancing anxiously around the room. Sure enough, Hinata was gone, and Kageyama should have breathed a sigh of relief. Instead, he felt a wave of nausea come over him, and he moved to sit at the edge of his bed, elbows resting on his knees as he buried his face in his hands.

Honestly though, what had he expected? That Hinata would be as bright and cheery as ever after the way Kageyama had reacted last night? _He’s probably never gonna speak to me again. Shit... shouldn’t that be a good thing? But then why am I so anxious?_

Kageyama groaned into his hands, feeling like his brain was trying to split itself in half. He couldn’t remember ever having felt this conflicted in his life. Emotions had always been pretty black and white for him. But ever since he started living with Hinata, everything felt so… complicated. _How can I not even know what I want? None of this makes any fucking sense… Am I going crazy?_

No matter how much he tried to understand what was happening in his head, he just kept swimming in circles until he couldn’t take it anymore. Thinking was getting him nowhere, he needed to _do_ something. But what the hell _could_ he do? He’d never been in a situation anything like this before. How was he supposed to tell Hinata how he felt about what happened when he didn’t even _know_? And would Hinata even want to talk to him after the way he’d freaked out?

Kageyama replayed the aftermath of last night’s encounter—how he’d practically thrown Hinata to the floor and run away, hiding in the bathroom like a goddamn coward. He thought about Hinata’s muffled voice through the door, softer than he’d ever heard it before, and how he’d snapped at him to go away. At the time he’d been too overcome with sheer panic to even think about it, but now… There had to be _something_ he could do to make things right… 

“Ah! I’ve got it!” he blurted, smacking his fist in his open palm as the solution finally dawned on him. “I have to apologize to Hina—”

At that same moment, the door swung open to reveal his roommate standing in the entryway, a paper bag under his arm and two cups of coffee in his hands.

“—ta…” 

“Apologize to me for what?” Hinata asked casually as he toed off his shoes.

Kageyama tried not to look like a deer in headlights, but he felt like his heart was trying to climb up his throat and it was making it difficult to calm down. “Oh! Um, you’re here, um…”

Hinata cut him off before he could really start blabbering. “Yeah, I got you breakfast!” he said with a bright smile, plopping himself on the floor near Kageyama’s bed and extending a cup towards him.

Kageyama blinked a few times, staring down at his roommate in utter shock. _What the hell? He left… to get breakfast? Not to avoid me? Why would he… Wait, there’s no way I_ actually _dreamed what happened, right?_

Hinata didn’t seem to notice the steam pouring out of Kageyama’s ears as his poor little brain tried to make sense of the situation. His roommate just patiently waited for him to accept the coffee, showing no sign that he felt any of the awkwardness or tension in the air.

Kageyama cleared his throat and tried to find his voice again. “Um. Why?” he managed to ask bluntly.

“What do you mean ‘why,’ Bakageyama? You know how important breakfast is!” Hinata thrust the steaming cup closer and Kageyama instinctively grabbed it, not trusting him not to spill it all over the bed.

“No, I mean, why did you get me anything? After last night…” Kageyama trailed off, still unsure how to broach the subject. He no longer worried that Hinata was seriously upset or disgusted, but that did nothing to quell his anxiety and embarrassment. On the contrary, the relief he felt only confused him further.

“Um, about that…” Hinata started, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “I guess, um, I wanted to apologize?”

Kageyama was startled out of his thoughts, nearly dropping the coffee himself. “Y-you did?” he stammered. Everything so far was going exactly the opposite of how he’d expected, and he had no idea how to handle any of it. Maybe that’s what he deserved for trying to keep up with someone like Hinata.

“Yeah, I uh, I guess I got pretty drunk at a party last night, and I must have come home and passed out before you got back from the tournament…” Hinata confessed, bowing his head in shame as he spoke. “I’m sorry I forgot to wait up for you, please tell me about the game!”

“What… the hell are you talking about?” Kageyama asked slowly. Seriously, how many times was Hinata planning to short-circuit his brain today? 

Hinata sighed and looked up again, apparently annoyed that Kageyama couldn’t understand his apology. “I _said_ I’m sorry I forgot to wait for you, I really really wanted to hear about the tournament, but I got drunk and I passed out, okay?” he huffed as he crossed his arms. “There, now I apologized twice, _and_ I got you breakfast, so you totally have to forgive me and tell me everything!”

A new kind of panic was rising in Kageyama’s chest as his brain slowly put the pieces together. “Hinata… “ he started cautiously, “did—did you get so drunk that you don’t remember… stuff?” he stammered. He’d almost said ‘remember what happened,’ but it suddenly seemed like a bad idea to mention it. _If he seriously doesn’t remember, and I try to explain... there’s no way he’s gonna believe me! I’ll come off looking like some fucking perv who took advantage of his drunk roommate!_

Hinata looked sheepish once again. “Um, I mean I remember most of the night, I think… I had fun at the party, but… I guess I’m not really sure how I got home,” he admitted, staring down at his lap.

“You—You were _that_ drunk?” Kageyama asked, shocked. He wasn’t really used to being around drunk people, so he didn’t know what it looked like when someone was blacked out, but Hinata had at least seemed aware of himself, hadn’t he?

Hinata just nodded in response, still not making eye contact.

 _Idiot. Of course he was blacked out. Why the hell would he have done that if he had any idea what was going on? Of course he wouldn’t. God, I’m so fucking stupid…_ As much as Kageyama wanted to sit there and beat himself up, he needed to think of something to say, and quick, before Hinata realized how weird he was acting and got suspicious.

“That’s… so fucking stupid, Hinata,” Kageyama scolded, shaking his head and doing his best to make his tone firm. “Do you even know what could have happened to you, stumbling drunk across campus in the middle of the night? I bet you didn’t even think about any of that stuff, you dumbass. You were probably too busy worrying about coming here so you could bother me, weren’t you?” 

The guilty look on Hinata’s face when he raised his head confirmed as much. Kageyama clenched his jaw to keep a stern expression, stomping down the part of himself that wanted to be amused by Hinata’s dedication to their post-volleyball hangouts. “Seriously, how could you be that dumb?” Kageyama continued. His mind was still reeling, but at least scolding Hinata for being an idiot came as naturally as breathing.

“I don’t _know_ , I was drunk!” Hinata whined, pouting for just a moment before a familiar teasing smirk crept onto his face. “But it’s nice to know that you care enough to worry about something like that, Kageyama,” he purred.

“Wha—I wasn’t _worried_!” Kageyama sputtered, his cheeks heating up. “I’m just saying if you’re going to drink you should be careful or you’ll cause problems for people!”

“Okay, okay, _fine_ ,” Hinata sighed, though Kageyama could tell he was still stifling a smile. “I promise I’ll be more careful next time, now will you _pleeeaaase_ tell me about the tournament already?” he begged, batting his eyelashes as he looked up at his roommate.

Kageyama frowned and looked away to stare down at the warm cup in his hands. “It’s not like there’s much to talk about…” he muttered, knowing even as he said it that Hinata would never let such a lame response fly.

“What?!” Hinata exclaimed, clearly offended by the idea. “What kind of half-ass answer is that, Bakageyama? It was your first ever college tournament, what do you _mean_ there’s not much to talk about?!”

Kageyama shrugged, taking a careful sip of coffee to stall for a moment. He half expected the same sickly sweet concoction Hinata had tried to poison him with the first time they’d met, but to his surprise it was exactly how he liked it. _When did Hinata learn my coffee order?_

“Come on, Kageyama, you gotta tell me everything!” his roommate pushed, impatient as ever.

“I told you, there’s not much to tell,” Kageyama grumbled. “We played two matches and we won, so we get to play again. What else are you looking to hear?”

Although he wasn’t looking, he could feel Hinata glare at him. “Kageyama, you’re being really dumb,” he said matter-of-factly. “Are you mad at me still? Is that why you don’t wanna tell me? It’s not fair if you won’t even tell me you’re mad at me!”

“I’m not mad at you, dumbass,” Kageyama snapped, rolling his eyes. “I never asked you to wait up for me. I just don’t wanna talk about the tournament, it wasn’t that interesting.”

Hinata definitely wasn’t buying it. “I don’t believe you! Tell me the real reason you don’t wanna talk!” he demanded, crossing his arms over his chest and fixing his roommate with the firmest look he could muster. Kageyama made the mistake of glancing down at him and nearly slapped himself for thinking that Hinata was actually kind of cute when he pouted like that.

“No!” Kageyama snarled, maybe more aggressively than he meant to. He realized belatedly that his answer only proved that there was in fact a hidden reason for his refusal. “I said I don’t want to so leave it alone!”

“No way!” Hinata replied adamantly, puffing his cheeks out in anger. “Tell me!”

“No!”

“Tell me, Kageyama!”

“ _No_!”

“Kagey _amaaaaaa_!" Hinata reached out to tug at the leg of Kageyama’s pajamas. “If you don’t tell me now I’m gonna beg you all day!”

Kageyama kicked Hinata’s hand away, pulling his legs up to the relative safety of his bed. “You’re not even begging now,” he scoffed, “you’re just annoying me. If you’re going to beg, shouldn't you be asking nicely?”

To his surprise and horror, Hinata seemed to actually consider this for a second, before he stopped glaring and pinned Kageyama with that _stupid_ god damn pout and wide, pleading eyes. “Please, Kageyama?” he whined, and the change in tone had Kageyama clenching his teeth for totally new reasons. 

Kageyama pointedly turned his gaze away from the sight of Hinata _literally begging on his knees_ , knowing he was going to be in big trouble if he let himself get distracted. “No, fuck you,” Kageyama grumbled, though his tone had lost its edge.

He hoped Hinata would get mad and immediately go back to his normal pestering, but instead he let out another high whine, and Kageyama couldn’t help but glance at him again. Hinata’s eyes and voice were drawing him in like a magnet. “ _Please_ , Kagayama?” he repeated pitifully. “I’ll do anything you ask!”

Kageyama swallowed dryly. He never would have told Hinata to beg properly if he’d thought he’d actually _do_ it. _Does this guy have no sense of shame at all?_ Either way, the current situation was now 100 times worse than the simple threat of being annoyed all day, and Kageyama felt his resolve crumbling fast.

“God, _fine_ …” he groaned, pausing to take another sip of coffee. “I don’t wanna talk about it ‘cause I didn’t fucking play, okay?” he admitted begrudgingly, refusing to make eye contact once again.

“You… _what_?! What do you mean you didn’t play?!” Hinata cried.

“Well, I mean I did, but…” Kageyama sighed, wondering how he was going to explain the next part. “Fuck, I got benched, okay? Are you happy now?” He tried to sound angry rather than nervous—maybe if he could make Hinata feel guilty enough he’d drop the subject altogether.

“No, I’m not happy! That doesn’t make any sense, Kageyama, why would they bench _you_?! You’re like, the best setter in the country!”

“Okay, first of all, I’m not _that_ good, you dumbass,” Kageyama scoffed. “And second, even if I ever was, it doesn’t matter because I’m not now. I can’t fucking play anymore.”

“What do you _mean_ you can’t play, Kageyama?” Hinata demanded. “You’re not making any sense!”

“I mean I keep fucking up!” Kageyama snapped. “I can’t concentrate on volleyball when I’m—” He choked on his words, terrified of what he’d almost said. “I just… can’t play anymore. Can we stop talking about this already?” he pleaded, sparing a nervous glance at his roommate.

Maybe Hinata mistook his nerves for sadness, because he finally took pity on Kageyama and stopped pushing for an answer. “Alright, alright,” he conceded. “Just… promise me you’ll work really hard to get better again! There’s no way you’re allowed to quit before I’ve even gotten to see you play!” he declared firmly. “And you also have to promise you’ll tell me if there’s something I can do to help you play again. I know you’re too proud to ask for help, but volleyball’s too important for that, so suck it up!”

“Um… okay,” Kageyama replied awkwardly, thoroughly rattled by the sincerity in Hinata’s expression. Nobody else ever spoke to him or looked at him in the ways that Hinata did, and it still threw him for a loop every time.

“Okay! Let’s make it a real promise, then,” Hinata demanded with a grin, extending a hand up towards Kageyama, his little finger stuck out. 

“What, seriously?” Kageyama snorted, raising an eyebrow. “How old are you?”

“Just do it!” Hinata insisted. “If you don’t swear on it I’ll just bug you all day!”

“You’ll do that anyway.”

“ _Kageyamaaa_! Come on, don’t be mean!” He could tell by the look on Hinata’s face that he wasn’t going to let this go. 

Kageyama sighed, begrudgingly holding out his fist with his pinky extended. “Fine,” he grumbled. “I’ll swear on one condition: you’re never allowed to ask me about any of this stuff ever again.” 

“What?! That’s totally not fair!” Hinata complained, but Kageyama fixed him with a serious glare and he sighed in defeat. “Fine,” Hinata conceded, locking their pinkies together, “but you better keep your promises too!”

“...Fine,” Kageyama echoed, letting his finger curl around Hinata’s. There was a brief pause where they stared at each other, until Kageyama pulled his hand away, clearing his throat before he spoke up again. “So, um, can I have my breakfast now?”

Hinata beamed at him and finally unwrapped the paper bag he’d set on the floor, pulling out two bento boxes and offering one to Kageyama. He wordlessly accepted it and moved to sit next to his roommate on the floor, both of them digging into their food. Hinata began chatting away around mouthfuls of rice, relaying some story about the party he’d been to last night. Kageyama tuned out, focusing on listening to his own heartbeat in his chest, much steadier than it had been earlier. This whole situation still didn’t make any sense, but he couldn’t deny the relief he felt hearing Hinata speak to him so comfortably. He definitely had a lot of thinking to do, and he really needed to figure out how to stop being so distracted so he could play volleyball again. But for now, though, Kageyama was content with just sitting next to Hinata, watching him fling rice onto the floor as he gestured wildly, brown eyes sparkling with excitement. 

At some point, Hinata stopped talking, and Kageyama realized from the expectant look on his face that he must have asked him a question. “Um… yeah,” he tried, hoping that Hinata was just looking for him to agree with whatever he’d said.

Apparently that was the wrong bet to make, because Hinata frowned and set his bento down so he could cross his arms over his chest. “Kageyama, were you even listening to me at all?”

“... Not really, no.”

“You jerk!” Hinata cried, reaching out to smack his roommate playfully on the head. Without missing a beat, Kageyama smacked him right back, which provoked Hinata to go for a tackle. From there it devolved into a petty wrestling match, both of them grabbing at each other and trying to avoid getting hit while also trying to smack the shit out of the other. Hinata squealed and giggled the whole time, until eventually he collapsed forward and buried his face in Kageyama’s chest, shielding the back of his head with his hands. “I give! I give!” he cried around his laughter. “You win, don’t hit me anymore!”

Kageyama paused as Hinata leaned into him, his hand frozen in midair. Without thinking, he gently lowered it toward Hinata’s head, sliding his fingers through soft orange hair. Almost immediately, though, he became aware of himself and tightened his grip, using it to pull Hinata off of him and give him a smug look. Hinata stuck his tongue out, and Kageyama was distraught by the sudden urge to lean forward and kiss that bratty look off his face. He instantly let go and turned away so his roommate couldn’t see him blush. _Shit, I am so fucking screwed, aren’t I?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I must emphasize the fact that kags has exactly one (1) brain cell
> 
> anyway, thank you so much to everyone for your patience thus far! I know this is a bit of a frustrating slow build, especially as updates are taking longer now, but I have a lot of ideas for this fic and I wanna do my best to get it right and hopefully build up to a worthwhile payoff at the end. thank you again so much for reading, I'm looking forward to reading your comments and having your continued support!!


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